May 24, 2010

Sh*t My Dad Says

Holy crap this is funny.  My poor mother has just had incredibly painful back surgery and is facing months of more painful and tedious recovery.  I went to the bookstore to pick up Barbara Ehrenreich's new book Bright Sided: How the Relentless Promotion of Positive Thinking Has Undermined America because, well, she's definitely not feeling bright-sided about this turn of events.  Frankly, she thinks it sucks.

So I thought I'd get her something funny as well and this is just the ticket.  I grew up with a family of potty-mouths (well, not quite like this guy, but we had our fun) and we had a rip-roaring time at the dinner table tearing into each other and laughing our heads off.  It was fun and we all still get along.  It's weird, I know.  My friends in high school would come over sometimes, find me gone, and still stay to hang out with my parents.  That's how awesome they are.

Yes, Justin Halpern's dad says some colorful and hilarious and politically incorrect things that will make you pee your pants laughing.  Or it will at least make my mom pee her pants laughing and that's all I care about really.  But that's not all the book is about.  It's full of the love this guy has for his family and people in general.  The chapter, "Not Everyone's Balls Should Be Busted" is a perfect case in point.  The dad, Sam, gives up coaching his son's Little League team because the kids and parents are  just too spoiled for him.  But he continues to not only coach his son, but another boy who is a bit of a misfit.  During a game, another father loudly berates this poor kid, destroying any confidence he may have had.

Sam confronts this other parent and has it out with him.  Not in some violent tirade, just someone demanding a little human decency.  "The kid's dad's a drunk.  His family's a goddam mess, and you know that.  And you're sitting out there screaming at him, trying to rattle him like this is the goddam Major League so your kid can win a Little League game?  You're a grown man, goddam it.  What the hell is wrong with you?"

My dad would have done the same thing, no question.  Those guys are awesome.  Shaming that other dad was by far the best way to handle it.

This is obviously not for everyone, but it'll crack up my mom up and make her feel a bit better and there's not much more I could hope for.

Here's more on the book.  (I hear it's even going to be a sit-com with The Shatner).